tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-66869573487589062622024-03-13T21:16:46.671-07:00Keen Doula CareChildbirth Education and Doula Services serving the Southwest Houston and Sugar Land areas.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger140125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-88125480672699009742017-11-13T10:09:00.003-08:002017-11-13T10:10:31.329-08:00New WebsiteI am in the process of moving everything to my new website. I would love for you to take a look. Click on the link below.<br />
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<a href="https://wordpress.com/post/houstondoula.wordpress.com/335">Keen Doula Care Houston, TX</a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-20839462117575985972017-07-24T12:06:00.000-07:002017-07-24T12:06:45.935-07:00Wanting vs needing pain meds in labor<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b>Deciding on how to manage the sensations of labor is probably the most discussed topic surrounding childbirth. Do you want an epidural? Do you want a natural birth? Do you need a childbirth class? Which one should you take? Do you need a few classes? Should you give birth in the hospital, birth center, or at home? How you plan to manage the sensations of labor determines where you give birth. You can't get an epidural at home!</b></i></span><br />
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I work with clients who have a variety of goals and needs for their births. Just how no two people are alike, no two births are alike. That is the beauty and wonder of birth. Most clients who seek my services desire to have a natural childbirth. While there are different definitions of what constitutes "natural," most people who approach me want two things:<br />
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1. To avoid a Cesarean<br />
2. To avoid pain meds<br />
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Many of my clients use pain meds in labor, so I want to share some thoughts about this.<br />
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<b><span style="color: #666666; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Sometimes a person might NEED pain meds in labor. Some examples might include:</span></b><br />
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1. Needing a surgical birth<br />
2. An inability to cope with the sensations of labor despite trying a multitude of comfort measures<br />
3. A persistent cervical lip and a cervix that starts to swell despite doing all the tricks in the book<br />
4. Exhaustion (i.e. hasn't slept days and labor has been taking a really long time)<br />
5. Client says so<br />
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Let me say a note about #5.<br />
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I am a professional believer in you, you are capable-er, you are a badass-er, the bomb dot com-er, you are strong enough-er, I know you can do this-er, these doubts are part of the process-er, you've got this-er, let's try something else-er. I am an encourager and confidence instiller. I am a believer in your strength despite what others in the room, yes, even sometimes YOU, think. When they doubt, when even YOU begin to doubt, I believe. I never stop believing.<br />
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But I have a confession to make. It is very difficult for me to turn that off. I will encourage. I will suggest other things. But I will never say that I think you need pain meds. I will never suggest it. You probably asked me not to mention pain meds anyway. You hired me to be the one person to never ask you, "Are you suuuuure you don't want an epidural?" And I truly believe deep down to the core of my being that you don't need one.<br />
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That is, until you tell me you do.<br />
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Here's my promise to you, amazing clients. I will never ever ever stand between you and receiving pain meds if that is what you want. I might have a few tricks up my sleeve to help you get back in your groove if you hit a wall, but if you say you're done, I believe you. I support you. And I do NOT judge you. Please know that. And I am not disappointed in you. I am not disappointed in myself either. I would not put that burden on you. I understand that your choices are not a reflection of me or my skill as a doula. They're your very own unique and wonderful choices. They belong to you.<br />
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<span style="color: #666666; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Sometimes a person might WANT pain meds in labor. Here are a few examples:</b></span><br />
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1. Natural birth is not appealing. Like, at all.<br />
2. Goals change<br />
3. More painful than expected<br />
4. Sleep deprivation<br />
5. Client says so<br />
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I don't know about you, but it is hard for me to say that I want something. I feel selfish, and I struggle about my wants and needs. I have a feeling many others might understand. But let me say this.<br />
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<b>Wanting pain meds in labor is a good enough reason to have them. </b><br />
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It is ok to have them even if you don't need them. It really is ok. Just like you don't have to justify or explain your reasons for wanting a natural birth to anyone, you do not need to justify your reasons for wanting pain meds to me or anyone else. I trust you to know what is best for you. I want you to have a satisfying birth experience, however that looks for you.<br />
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I've been around long enough to see that instincts are a wonderful thing. Even if those instincts say, "I need to go to the hospital now even though it is still really early and we planned to labor at home as long as possible" or "I think I should be induced even though we were planning a home birth" or "I think I would like an epidural even though I appear to be coping well and took all the birth classes and read all the books and hired a doula."<br />
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So if you decide in labor that you need or even want pain meds as part of your experience, I promise to support you. I promise to remain by your side. I promise not to judge. I promise not to question your choice. I promise to continue providing the same unwavering and compassionate support as always.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-92081369522352949062017-04-19T09:15:00.001-07:002017-06-28T14:09:41.437-07:00Doulas and Birth Outcomes<div dir="ltr" id="yui_3_16_0_1_1468454468978_2485" style="-webkit-padding-start: 0px; background-color: white; padding: 0px;">
<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>When I first became a doula six years ago, I thought my job was to help improve birth outcomes. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Everything I read about doulas boasted the same stats:</span></div>
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<li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">50% reduction in cesarean rate</span></li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">25% shorter labor</span></li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">60% reduction in epidural requests</span></li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">30% reduction in pain medication use</span></li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">40% reduction in forceps delivery</span></li>
<li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">40% reduction in oxytocin (pitocin) use</span></li>
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<span style="line-height: 20px;">These stats come from the book <i>Mothering the Mother</i> by Marshall Klaus, John Kennell, & Phyllis Klaus and were listed on most of the material about doulas I could get my hands on at the time. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>As a new doula, I thought my job was to help people have natural births. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">After all, one of the first bits of advice people receive after proclaiming they want a natural childbirth is, "Hire a doula!" People were coming to me because they wanted natural births, and, by golly, I wanted to help them have natural births!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Early on, I started to notice something. Not everyone who said they wanted to have a natural childbirth during our interview ended up wanting one once they were in labor. At first, I took this as a personal failure. I thought, maybe if I were a better doula, maybe if I had more experience, maybe if I had said that one thing or tried that one position, they would have had their natural birth. I started to learn that wanting a natural birth is not always enough, and that sometimes, birth does not go how we hope or plan despite our best efforts to do "everything right."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Then I took my <a href="http://birthbootcampdoulas.com/">Birth Boot Camp DOULA</a> training and learned something that would forever change the way I thought about what it means to be a doula.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>I learned during my training that doulas are not responsible for birth outcomes.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I breathed out a huge sigh of relief - one that I had been holding in for years. Something clicked for me. I realized that I was actually doing a good job as a supportive doula even though my clients were having all kinds of births, not just natural births. I am ashamed to admit that I couldn't understand why they were so happy when I often didn't help them achieve the natural births they said they wanted.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">They seemed to understand something that I didn't.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>So what are doulas for if they don't help improve birth outcomes?</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><i><b>Support. Unconditional, non-judgmental support.</b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas help you remember your options when others are telling you what decisions they think you should make.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas help you gather as much information as you want or need when others give unsolicited advice. Or not enough advice.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas stand by your side no matter what you decide when others tell you </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">they would "never do that."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas understand the <a href="http://birthbootcampdoulas.com/8046-2/">art of holding space</a> when others want to take up space.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas know who the awesome and supportive care providers are. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas have a unique point of view because they often attend births in hospitals, birth centers, and homes.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://birthbootcampdoulas.com/dads-and-doulas-how-they-work-together/">Doulas encourage your partner to participate</a> to their own level of comfort when everyone else forgets they exist. Or expects them to do everything.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas won't mind if you burp, yell, make tons of noise, make no noise, forget to say "excuse me," or "thank you."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas are the ones who give you a foot massage or a scalp rub or offer kind words as you prepare for your <a href="http://birthbootcampdoulas.com/doulas-cesarean-birth/">Cesarean birth</a>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas are the ones who offer a cool breeze or take a quick picture or offer an encouraging word as you push your baby into the world.</span></div>
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Doulas know when to be quiet, when to talk, when to touch, when to step back, when to suggest, when to listen, when to offer....</div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas remind you how amazing you are when others may forget this is a once in a lifetime experience for you.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas ask, "How would YOU like to do this? What would work for YOU?"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas instill confidence when others instill fear.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas remind you that you CAN when others say you CAN'T.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Doulas are a great addition to your birth team, but can't guarantee any certain birth outcome. Doulas are there for informational, physical, emotional, and <a href="http://birthbootcampdoulas.com/relational-support-the-foundation-of-doula-work/">relational support</a>. While doulas can't determine birth outcomes, they can and do help make the birth experience more satisfying and enjoyable. In short, they help make your birth experience better. </span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-53928159795330322382016-11-29T09:11:00.002-08:002016-11-29T09:26:50.092-08:00How to Be a Doula (as Demonstrated by Elf on the Shelf)<div dir="ltr" id="yui_3_16_0_1_1480435443055_2362" style="-webkit-padding-start: 0px; background-color: white; padding: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><i><b>We are entering the season of yummy treats and silly elf antics, blinking lights and jolly white-haired guys. I thought it might be fun to explain what doulas DO in a fun and lighthearted way. </b></i></span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Validate and encourage</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Do you have a friend who loves Elf on the Shelf and faithfully sets up little schemes for that pesky elf to get into?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">She is the most fun friend who has the coolest ideas. She is so imaginative and creative. She is making memories her kids will cherish forever.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Do you have a friend who hates Elf on the Shelf because he has a creepy little face?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">She might have had an experience in her life that left her feeling very uncomfortable with the thought of dolls "watching" her and her children all day and night. Mind your own business, and don't pry into her past. Try to put yourself in her shoes and say, "I can totally understand that."</span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Support all choices</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Do you have a friend that thinks playing "Naughty Elf on the Shelf" is the way to go?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Sweet! Maybe offer up a few other naughty elf ideas you have seen in the past.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Do you have a friend that wants to try Elf on the Shelf for the first time? Maybe she wants to go all out. Maybe she doesn't.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Sweet! Support her choice either way. Both choices are perfectly acceptable and valid and will provide a magical experience for her family.</span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Educate</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Do you have a friend who wants to try Elf on the Shelf but doesn't know where to begin? A few simple blog posts may help. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Do you have a friend who has no idea where to find an Elf on the Shelf? Share ideas of where they can be found and how to get the best deal for one.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Do you have a friend who thinks the entire idea is stupid and wants nothing to do with it?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Shun that friend. They are a lost cause.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I totally kid.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Perhaps they may be more interested in the idea of <a href="http://www.kindnesselves.com/ideas/christmas-tradition/">Kindness elves</a>. Maybe they celebrate other traditions and can share their traditions with you. Be open to learning something new. </span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Hold Space</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Is your friend getting overwhelmed with the holidays with too much on her plate and just can't continue on with this whole Elf on the Shelf thing?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Hold space for those feelings.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Is your friend totally excited and wants to show you all the Elf on the Shelf things with daily pictures on Facebook?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Hold space. Click like. Better yet, try out all of the other buttons.</span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Help process difficult emotions</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Did your friend work so very hard to create magical Elf on the Shelf moments but her kids just were not into it? Did they misbehave anyway? Did they stop believing in the magic of the season this year? Did things just not go as planned?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Listen. Lean into the uncomfortable feelings. Be ok with difficult emotions. Your friend trusts you enough to share her difficult emotions with you. Consider it an honor.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Avoid sentences that start with, "At least."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">"At least you have an Elf on the Shelf."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">"At least your kids have already made magical memories."</span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Help her find her voice</b></span></div>
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-iU-lz-1Jw5g/WD2yX92A8iI/AAAAAAAABsI/3y7DDUTC2kMkxEI3P-te1v2vklEOmvm-ACEw/s1600/babywearing%2Belf%2Bon%2Bshelf.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-iU-lz-1Jw5g/WD2yX92A8iI/AAAAAAAABsI/3y7DDUTC2kMkxEI3P-te1v2vklEOmvm-ACEw/s320/babywearing%2Belf%2Bon%2Bshelf.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: inherit;"></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Do you have a friend who really doesn't want to do Elf on the Shelf, but feels tons of pressure to do it because that is what all the "good moms" are doing?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Help her find her voice to say, "No! I am enough. I don't need to do something I have no interest in doing, and that stresses me out, in order to be a good mom. I am totally a great mom! My kids can have a perfectly magical experience without Elf on the <strike>Freaking </strike>Shelf."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">This is by no means an exhaustive list on how to be a doula, but it is a good start. After you take an amazing <a href="http://birthbootcampdoulas.com/">Birth Boot Camp DOULA</a> training, of course!</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-28457340266385206742016-11-28T14:29:00.001-08:002016-11-28T14:55:59.356-08:005 Reasons People Don't Hire Doulas (And the 1 Reason Why They Shouldn't)<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b>I have had many conversations with many women about my work as a doula. Most of the time they are seeking a listening ear for their questions or concerns. Often, these conversations end with some variation of why they can't hire a doula. Below are a few of the most common reasons. </b></i></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Doula performing a double hip squeeze<br />
Image created using Canva</td></tr>
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<span style="color: #073763; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">1. I can't afford a doula.</span><br />
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Most doulas are willing to make payment arrangements. Houston doulas charge very differently, so it is possible to find a doula to fit any budget. Some doulas will even barter. Some families include a doula on their baby registry.<br />
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<span style="color: #073763; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">2. My husband doesn't want a doula.</span><br />
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This usually stems from a misunderstanding of what a doula does. <a href="http://birthbootcampdoulas.com/dads-and-doulas-how-they-work-together/">Doulas do not replace the partner</a> nor take over. A woman's desire for a doula does not indicate that the partner is not good enough. Doulas support both parents in the way that they have decided beforehand. My goal as a doula is to make Dad the hero! I am an extra set of hands and ideas to help the experience become as wonderful a memory as possible. I am there for only one day, but Dad will be there forever! I want her to remember how amazing he was, so my biggest goal is to <i>enhance </i>what Dad can do-not replace.<br />
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<span style="color: #073763; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">3. I don't want a stranger in the room.</span><br />
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You will know your doula better than anyone in the room other than your partner and maybe your care provider. <a href="http://birthbootcampdoulas.com/relational-support-the-foundation-of-doula-work/">One of the foundations of doula support is relational support.</a> By the time you are ready to give birth, you have likely spent several hours together. You've met and chatted at least 3 times. You have cultivated a trusting relationship together. You have shared intimate details of your life with your doula. You have shared your hopes and dreams for your upcoming birth. Your doula will be a familiar face in a sea of strangers on your birthing day. You will not know the nurses, residents, any other personnel that may be present. You may not even know your care provider should your normal care provider not be on-call that day. Your doula will not be the stranger in the room that day.<br />
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<span style="color: #073763; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">4. I want an epidural/am giving birth in the hospital/already have a midwife.</span><br />
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Doulas support any kind of birth. <a href="http://birthbootcampdoulas.com/doulas-epidural-birth/">Doulas are great for women planning to have an epidural</a> because they know techniques to help keep labor progressing. Most doulas attend births in the hospital because most women give birth there. Doulas and midwives make a great team together.<br />
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<span style="color: #073763; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">5. My care provider said I don't need one/doesn't work with doulas.</span><br />
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A care provider who wants to discourage a woman from seeking as much support as she can raises a red flag in my book. I get it. When I was pregnant with my first baby, I raised concerns that I wouldn't be able to have a doula. I was told I didn't need one because doulas are a luxury. I took that as an attempt to be reassuring at the time, but looking back, I wasn't given all of the information. A simple statement of, "You can find a doula to fit your budget if you really want one," could have been offered. Even adding, "But I think you are capable of giving birth without one," would have been more supportive.<br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Sometimes people give me these reasons because they truly believe that these are obstacles that stand in their way of having a doula. I am happy to help people find a doula if they really want one.</b></span></i><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>However, sometimes people want to tell me they aren't hiring a doula for the above reasons just to be nice. They don't want to tell me the real reason, which I believe is the ONLY reason people shouldn't hire a doula.</b></span></i><br />
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<span style="color: #073763; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">1. I don't want to hire a doula.</span><br />
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Wonderful! No one says you have to hire a doula to have a great birth. If you don't want a doula, it is perfectly acceptable not to hire a doula. If you are friends with a doula, it is ok to be direct and say you aren't interested. We are professionals and can understand. If you give us one of the other reasons, we will do our doula thing by giving options and trying to help you overcome obstacles. We will give you information about dispelling common doula myths. Because that is what we do. We will doula you until we get to the heart of the matter. And if that is simply you don't want a doula, then that is ok! You do you. Own that choice.<br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-4601657673225668712016-08-31T11:07:00.000-07:002016-08-31T11:33:08.455-07:00Making labor easier...with childbirth education<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Not long after I started working as a doula in Houston, I began to notice an interesting trend. My clients who took an independent childbirth class were more likely to achieve the birth they were seeking. Witnessing how much more prepared for labor those clients were fueled my desire to become a childbirth educator.</span><br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nWKwX6BlCIs/V8ccK9wxowI/AAAAAAAABrM/yKHAdxmOeJ45etLK9vkL1LvVQ04n2spXACLcB/s1600/making%2Blabor%2Beasier%2Bchildbirth%2Bed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="360" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nWKwX6BlCIs/V8ccK9wxowI/AAAAAAAABrM/yKHAdxmOeJ45etLK9vkL1LvVQ04n2spXACLcB/s640/making%2Blabor%2Beasier%2Bchildbirth%2Bed.jpg" width="640" /></a><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">There are many excellent options for childbirth education, but I will focus on Birth Boot Camp. <a href="http://birthbootcamp.com/">Birth Boot Camp</a> is a modern, evidence-based, and comprehensive course geared towards couples planning a natural childbirth. While the focus is on natural childbirth, the curriculum equips couples to navigate any type of birth.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">What is an independent childbirth class?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">An independent childbirth class is a childbirth class that is unaffiliated with a hospital or birth center. In other words, the curriculum is independent of any institution's philosophies about birth. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">How can taking an independent childbirth class make labor easier?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Childbirth education helps to prepare you and your partner by providing tools that can make labor easier. The skills couples learn in Birth Boot Camp classes include the following:</span><br />
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Relaxation</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Right from the start, couples begin to learn about relaxation. Learning how to relax your body and mind is crucial for making labor easier. In a society where relaxation is seen as unproductive and lazy, and achievement and busy-ness are considered superior, many people need to re-learn this important skill. The Field Manual each couple receives contains scripts and guided relaxations that couples practice during class and on their own at home. While relaxation may not look the same to everyone, it is important to learn how to relax your mind and body during labor. Childbirth classes teach you how.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Comfort Measures</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Beginning in Class 2, couples fill their tool box with different comfort measures that can help ease the discomforts of labor. Being up and active often helps labor to progress more smoothly, but that is often the last thing people want to do once they are in active labor! Learning various comfort measures can make this easier.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Discernment</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Birth Boot Camp teaches couples how to navigate their health care. From teaching about common tests and procedures that occur during pregnancy that can change the course of labor before it even has a chance to begin, to choosing a care provider that will support the birth you are seeking, couples will learn the information they need to navigate their care. Being able to discern when to accept or decline certain interventions is one of the most important skills needed to having the kind of birth you want and for making labor easier.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Confidence</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Finally, being surrounded by other couples who are in the same place as you and being armed with tools to have your best birth will give you confidence. Confidence helps make labor much easier. Confidence relaxes your mind. Confidence relaxes your muscles. A relaxed mind and relaxed muscles make labor much easier.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Check out <a href="http://www.houstonbbci.com/">www.houstonbbci.com</a> </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large; text-align: center;">to find a Birth Boot Camp class near you.</span><br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-24268921057877410442016-08-13T16:34:00.003-07:002016-08-13T16:34:41.881-07:00Making labor easier...with water!<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">One of my favorite tools to use during labor, not only for my own labors, but for my clients as well, is water. I have experienced first-hand the benefits water provides during labor. Below are several ways to use water during labor to help make labor easier.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #073763; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>Tub</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Many women find a lot of comfort laboring in the tub. So much so that they often give birth in there. When a baby is born under water, usually in a tub or birth pool, it is called a <a href="http://evidencebasedbirth.com/waterbirth/">water birth</a>. Water birth is available in Houston in most homes and birth centers. Unfortunately, at this time, there are no hospitals in Houston that offer water birth. There are a few that are equipped to offer the option of laboring in the tub, but delivering your baby in the tub won't be allowed. Check with your hospital to see if this option is available.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Many women choose water birth or water labor because it has been shown to shorten labor, speed up labor, and helps to ease the discomforts of labor. For these reasons, it has been dubbed "Nature's Epidural."</span><br />
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<span style="color: #073763; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>Shower</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Sometimes laboring in the tub is not feasible for a variety of reasons. The most common reasons I have seen are: the facility is not equipped with tubs, having ruptured membranes with a care provider who is not comfortable with the client laboring in the tub, or the electronic fetal monitors do not work very well in the tub. Sometimes women just don't like the idea of laboring in the tub.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The shower is a great compromise. Showers provide many of the same benefits as tubs. Using the shower during labor also provides an opportunity for some much-needed privacy, which is also super beneficial for labor. Feeling watched can slow labor down.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #073763; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>Hydration</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">It is important to stay <a href="http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/pregnancy-childbirth/ninth-month/easy-ways-stay-well-nourished-during-labor">hydrated during labor</a>. Dehydration can slow contractions down during labor. Take sips of water between contractions, or try a nice <a href="http://www.mommypotamus.com/how-to-make-a-labor-aid-electrolyte-drink/">Labor-aid recipe</a>. One of the perks of drinking lots of water during labor is the need to empty your bladder often. Sitting on the toilet is a great way to encourage dilation as our bodies are already used to relaxing there. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Your care provider may recommend <a href="http://evidencebasedbirth.com/are-iv-fluids-necessary-during-labor/">IV fluids during labor</a> in order to avoid dehydration as well. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Many women extol the benefits of laboring or giving birth in water. Ask your care provider how she can support making labor easier for you...using water!</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-90697799328393494782016-02-17T11:16:00.002-08:002016-02-17T11:20:40.546-08:00Vag TV - Not as Fun as it Sounds<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Have you ever been really good at something, only to get really self-conscious about it when someone starts to watch you? </i></span><br />
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I cook dinner for my family just about every day, but when my mom starts to watch me cook something that I've cooked 1000 times, I start to fumble around and forget steps. Or what about when you are eating something in peace and then someone starts to watch you eat? Eating is easy! You know how to do it! But all of a sudden, eating becomes super awkward when you have an audience.<br />
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I've had to learn how to perform well under pressure during my training as a musician. Every Friday afternoon for four years, I attended a class called "Recital Hour." It took place in the recital hall. Each week, a handful of students would perform a prepared solo.<br />
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On stage...<br />
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In the spotlight...<br />
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For an audience of their peers...<br />
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Talk about nerve-wracking. I had to perform in recital hour at least twice each semester. This class was supposed to teach us how to perform for an audience.<br />
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I was super nervous on the days it was my turn to perform. What if I messed up? What if they laughed at me? What if I humiliated myself? What if I forgot the music? What if the music falls off the stand? (That happened to me once during a Scholarship Contest. I survived. I also won the scholarship.)<br />
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I always practiced at least three hours a day during the week. I always did my best to prepare for recital hour. But no matter how prepared I was, or how great I sounded in the comfortable solitude of the practice room, I always messed up on something during the performance. <i>I just didn't perform the same way in front of an audience as I did when I was alone.</i> I eventually learned how to overcome my performance anxiety, but it still feels very different to perform for an audience.<br />
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So when I visited some clients a few weeks ago, I was reminded of what it feels like to perform for an audience. I often remove my shoes and leave them at the front door of a client's home when I go visit them. This was such an occassion. After the visit was over, I walked to the door to put my shoes on. They were sneakers, and I know how to put on my shoes. I really do! I've put on shoes so many times that there is no way I could ever keep track of how many times I've put on shoes. All of a sudden, things got really quiet. My clients were watching me put on my shoes. And I felt really weird. Awkward. So I sang, "I am putting on my shoes right now. And I feel really awkward!"<br />
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We all had a good laugh at my silly song.<br />
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But still. I felt awkward. And watched. I wanted to run away, or clam up. This experience reminded me of Vag TV. What is Vag TV? Vag TV is:<br />
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<ul>
<li>That awkward moment someone asks you how dilated you are. And you've never met the person before. Or maybe you have. </li>
</ul>
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<br />
<ul>
<li>When you get asked when your due date is for the 1000th time. That day. </li>
</ul>
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<ul>
<li>When you walk around at church, and two people exclaim "You're so big! You're so small!" At the exact. same. time. </li>
</ul>
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<ul>
<li>When your friends/family/facebook friends from highschool you never even talked to so why are you facebook friends start asking you at 36 weeks if you've had your baby yet.</li>
</ul>
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<br />
<ul>
<li>When your sister/friend/cousin asks if they can attend your birth...just to see what it is like...</li>
</ul>
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It is feeling watched. Inhibited. Uncomfortable. Awkward. Rushed. Ogled.<br />
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Most people don't mean to do this. It happens, nonetheless. I know I've accidentally contributed to my fair share of Vag TV. I do my best to be mindful of this and stop as soon as I realize what I am doing.<br />
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I learned recently that the conditions for birth need to be like that of a date night. The same hormones that flow during a nice intimate time with your partner are the very same ones we want flowing during birth. These hormones don't flow as well when we feel watched, inhibited, uncomfortable, awkward, rushed, or ogled.<br />
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Rowan TwoSisters, Urban Curandera and creator of the <a href="http://laborwhisperer.com/">Labor Whispering</a> protocol, based the protocol off of Vag TV.<br />
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Simply put, <a href="http://laborwhisperer.com/vag-tv/">Vag TV can stop labor</a>.<br />
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Let's not do that.<br />
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Turn off the Vag TV!<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Schedule a Labor Whispering Session if you need help with that. </span><br />
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<i>Read more about Vag TV from my fellow Labor Whisperers:</i><br />
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<a href="http://www.appletreedoula.com/me/birth-announcements/">Birth Announcements</a> by Maureen of <a href="http://www.appletreedoula.com/">Apple Tree Doula Services</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.illuminatedrevelry.com/2015/12/30/32weeks-post-might-delaying-labor/">Why Your #32Weeks Post Might Be Delaying Your Labor</a> by Jessica of <a href="http://www.illuminatedrevelry.com/">Illuminated Revelry</a><br />
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<a href="http://motheringnature.net/ever-heard-of-vagtv/">Ever Heard of Vag TV? (Pronounced Vah-Juh)</a> by Erin of <a href="http://motheringnature.net/">Mothering Nature Birth Services</a><br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-73786062710011501722016-02-16T09:07:00.000-08:002016-02-16T09:07:03.789-08:005 Best Toys for Babies<i><span style="font-size: large;">Babies are born ready to learn about the world around them. There is no better way for them to learn about their world than through play and exploration. As the late Mr. Rogers said, "Play is really the work of childhood." But how does one play with a baby? Do they need toys? What kinds of toys do they need? Not surprisingly, the only toy babies need is their favorite thing of all- YOU! You are the most interesting thing in your baby's life. You are already equipped with everything your baby needs: from warmth, comfort, safety, and nourishment, to fun and entertainment. Here are my picks for the 5 Best Toys for Babies.</span></i><br />
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<span style="color: purple; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">1. Your Face</span><br />
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Your baby loves to look at your face! Babies love to see exaggerated faces with big smiles and big surprised eyes. Because babies process what is going on around them much slower than adults, it'll take almost an entire minute for a baby to mimic what you are doing. Literally, give them a minute, and they will try to mimic you. Newborns can only see a few inches in front of them, about the distance between your face and breast. Lean in close to them so they can see your face.<br />
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Things to try:<br />
<ul>
<li>Make funny faces</li>
<li>Poke out your tongue</li>
<li>Give kisses</li>
<li>Wiggle your eyebrows</li>
<li>Smile</li>
</ul>
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<br />
<span style="color: purple; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">2. Your Voice</span><br />
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Even before birth, your baby recognizes your voice. It is amazing to watch a brand new baby turn toward the parents' voices when they greet their new baby. Your baby loves your voice! It is a great toy.<br />
<br />
Things to try:<br />
<ul>
<li>Sing songs</li>
<li>Make funny noises</li>
<li>Talk to baby</li>
<li>Be sure to listen too!</li>
<li>Read to your baby</li>
</ul>
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<br />
<span style="color: purple; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">3. Your Breasts</span><br />
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Breasts are used for more than just nourishment. Even if you are not breastfeeding, your breasts can provide some entertainment, or even just comfort, for your baby. Many babies want to nurse when they are hungry, sleepy, scared, lonely, or even bored. I often ask people, "When you pick up a new kitten, how to you usually hold it?" Most people cuddle a kitten right up close to their hearts. Because they are cute. The same goes for babies. They like to be snuggled close.<br />
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Things to try:<br />
<ul>
<li>Let baby have tummy time on your chest</li>
<li>Wear your baby in a carrier against your chest</li>
<li>Wear a nursing necklace while cradling baby</li>
<li>Skin to skin contact on chest</li>
<li>Warning: older babies sometimes entertain themselves by twiddling nipples</li>
</ul>
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<br />
<span style="color: purple; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">4. Your Hands</span><br />
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You will do so much for your baby with your hands. Your baby has likely already enjoyed your touch while in the womb. You may have already noticed how your baby responds to your touch with kicks, jabs, and wiggles. The fun continues after birth!<br />
<br />
Things to try:<br />
<ul>
<li>Massage</li>
<li>Tickles</li>
<li>Peek a boo</li>
<li>This Little Piggy</li>
<li>Let your baby grasp and explore your hands</li>
</ul>
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<br />
<br />
<span style="color: purple; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">5. Your Legs</span></div>
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Your legs can provide so much entertainment for your baby, especially when they get a little older and more mobile.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div>
Things to try:</div>
<div>
<ul>
<li>Dance with your baby</li>
<li>Bouncing games in your lap</li>
<li>Sit in the floor and just let them climb over your legs</li>
<li>Lie on your back and play airplane</li>
<li>Prop your baby up with your thighs and just let your baby look at you</li>
</ul>
</div>
<div>
<br />
Your body can provide plenty of entertainment for your baby. In fact, they can become overstimulated just with you being their sole source of fun. Signs that your baby is overstimulated and needs a break include (1):<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Looking away</li>
<li>Shielding face</li>
<li>Pushing away</li>
<li>Fussing </li>
<li>Crying</li>
</ul>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
When your baby becomes overstimulated, things you can try include (2):</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<ul>
<li>Let baby suck on something</li>
<li>Hold baby close</li>
<li>Stay calm</li>
<li>Wait for baby to look back at you before resuming play</li>
<li>Wait for baby to be calm and relaxed</li>
</ul>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
It doesn't take much to entertain your baby. As you can see, you are all your baby needs for hours of fun. In fact, I still joke that Mommy is a jungle gym when it comes to my three kids, who are 5, 3, and 6 months. You are more than enough for your baby!</div>
</div>
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<br /></div>
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Sources:</div>
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<br /></div>
<div>
(1) <i>And Baby Makes Three</i>, Dr.'s John and Julie Gottman, pages 44-45</div>
<div>
(2) Ibid. 46-47</div>
</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-80146778870997285722016-01-21T09:46:00.000-08:002016-01-21T16:40:05.087-08:005 Sensations other than PAIN women can experience during childbirth<span style="font-size: large;"><i>When asking a woman what her biggest fear is about giving birth, she'll probably respond with, "Pain! I'm scared of the pain!" Most people describe giving birth as, "The worst pain imaginable," or "The worst pain you will ever experience." In other words, if you enter a conversation about birth, you will probably hear the word "pain" mentioned at least once.</i></span><br>
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Recently, I attended a class given by a local midwife, Anna Caffrey (who has since moved to England), about Pleasurable Birth. Wait. What? Can birth be pleasurable? Can women even experience...wait for it...<a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2334789/Women-orgasms-giving-birth.html#ixzz3gYCnBThk"><i>orgasms </i>during birth</a>? I'm here to tell you, yes! Yes they can. I did. Well, at least, <a href="http://keendoula.blogspot.com/2013/03/orgasmic-birth-best-kept-secret.html">I <i>almost </i>experienced an orgasm during the birth of my second child</a>.<br>
<br>
<b><i>Read</i></b>: <a href="file:///C:/Users/RobertKeen/Pictures/June%202014%20Pic%20DL%20Extraveganza/145-288-1-SM.pdf">Experiences of Pleasurable Childbirth: Uncovering a Blind Spot in Anthropology</a> by Anna Caffrey<br>
<br>
After attending the class, I was inspired to ask a few fellow Birth Boot Camp Instructors if they have experienced any sensations other than pain during their births. They had, and they were happy to share!<br>
<br>
<span style="color: #073763; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">1. Powerful</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Lauren McClain, a breech baby extraordinaire and <a href="http://www.betterbirthblog.org/">Birth Boot Camp Instructor in Maryland</a>, shared, <span style="background-color: white;">"<span style="line-height: 17.8667px;">Part of me approached birth as a scientist. What will this be like? What will I feel? How will I react? How will the feelings change if I do XYZ? </span></span></span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; line-height: 17.8667px;">The most apt term I can use to describe what I felt for all of my birth experiences is powerful. Where the power was or how the power felt depended on the individual experience."</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;">Janine Heincker, a <a href="http://www.abirth2remember.com/">Birth Boot Camp Instructor in Topeka, KS</a>, also describes her births as powerful. <span style="background-color: white;">"</span></span><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.8667px;">Overwhelming power is how I describe my intense births. I've learned to love it!"</span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 17.8667px;"><span style="color: #073763; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">2. Intense</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;">Vanessa Stepan, a <a href="https://bumpnaturally.wordpress.com/">Birth Boot Camp Instructor and birth doula in Bossier City, LA</a>, said about her birth,<span style="background-color: white;"> "</span></span><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.8667px;">Birth for me was intense but I would not consider it painful in the traditional sense. Being so mentally prepared and aware of the amazing journey my body was taking me on to meet my baby was so powerful. I was able to stay calm and just trust that my body and baby knew what to do."</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #073763; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;">3. Aware</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;">Melissa Meyer, a <a href="http://www.naturaloregonbirth.com/">Birth Boot Camp Instructor and yoga instructor in Corvallis and Albany, OR</a>, felt incredibly aware of her babies' movements during birth. She said, <span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">"</span></span><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.8667px;">I wanted so much to have an "orgasmic" birth! I told my husband he needed to kiss me through the whole thing. <span class="emoticon_text" style="clip: rect(1px 1px 1px 1px); height: 1px; overflow: hidden; position: absolute; width: 1px;">wink emoticon</span></span></span><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 17.8667px;">It ended up being so fast there wasn't much time for any of that. I do love the pushing phase and I have such awareness of my body that I ca</span><span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 17.8667px;">n feel the baby moving out of me. My second baby I felt her face as her head crowned. My third baby I felt her turn like a corkscrew right before I started to push. It's such an awesome feeling to feel your baby inside of you trying to get out."</span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;"></span><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;"><span class="emoticon emoticon_wink" style="background-image: url("/rsrc.php/v2/yx/r/pimRBh7B6ER.png"); background-position: 0px -442px; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: auto; display: inline-block; height: 16px; vertical-align: top; width: 16px;" title=";)"></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 17.8667px;"><span style="color: #073763; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">4. Connected</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;">Erin Marney, a <a href="http://www.coloradobirth.com/">Birth Boot Camp Instructor in Teller County, CO</a>, felt connected with her body during birth. <span style="background-color: white;">"</span></span><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.8667px;">I felt very connected with my body in a way I had never experienced before. Because I understood what was happening, I could feel and then visualize what was happening internally and with the baby. It was so intense, but knowing things were unfolding as they should was a comfort."</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;"><br></span></span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 17.8667px;"><span style="color: #073763; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">5. Orgasms</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;"><br></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;">And finally, the one you have been waiting for. Some women can even describe their birth experiences as "orgasmic." One Birth Boot Camp Instructor described her births as orgasmic. <span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">"</span></span><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;">I experienced two, for lack of a better understanding of the sensation, orgasms. They were nothing like in Orgasmic Birth, but they were definitely real. The most intense sensation came as I was transitioning from labor to pushing (I had no control ove</span><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;">r the pushing, my body just did it). I could feel my son's head engaging with my cervix to help get me to complete dilation (which sounds weird, but I could FEEL it happening) and I just got this strange and pleasurable sensation. It was like this internal surprise to remind me that what was happening was super awesome even though it wasn't exactly fun. If I hadn't been so aware and focused on what my body was doing, it might have been lost in the other sensations of pain. But it was this secret and special thing happening. I don't share that with many people because it was so special to me, but <i style="font-weight: bold;">birth can be enjoyable if you let go of what you expect and know of pain and pleasure." </i>(emphasis mine)</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: #f6f7f8; line-height: 17.8667px;"><br></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #f6f7f8; line-height: 17.8667px;"><i><b>Learn more:</b></i> Visit the <a href="http://orgasmicbirth.com/">Orgasmic Birth</a> website to learn more about the book, documentary, and childbirth classes. </span><br>
<span style="background-color: #f6f7f8; line-height: 17.8667px;"><br></span>
<span style="background-color: #f6f7f8; line-height: 17.8667px;"><i><b>Watch:</b></i> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZG0T7xHy6A&feature=youtu.be">This video</a> perfectly captures why we need to make our birthing environment more like we are preparing for a date night.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;">I love that women can have experiences other than pain during birth. Anna gave several suggestions on how to facilitate a more pleasurable birth experience during her talk. I am excited to share my knew knowledge with my clients! In short, make your birthing environment very similar to how you would for a date night. <a href="http://keendoula.blogspot.com/2015/08/the-one-thing-you-should-pack-in-your.html">Pack certain unmentionables in your birth bag</a>, and <a href="http://birthbootcamp.com/5-steps-to-mentally-prepare-for-birth/">prepare your mind for a great birth!</a></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 17.8667px;"><br></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: large; line-height: 17.8667px;"><i>I'd love to hear from you! Did you experience other sensations besides pain during your birth(s)? Please share your experiences. </i></span></span><br>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-47195055844656333732015-12-22T15:29:00.002-08:002015-12-22T16:02:46.483-08:00Labor Whispering in Sugar Land, TX<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-D3Civ-oVAao/Vnnb-pnd_zI/AAAAAAAABkY/yeXaYSqmtK8/s1600/LW%2Bfor%2Breal%2Bthis%2Btime.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-D3Civ-oVAao/Vnnb-pnd_zI/AAAAAAAABkY/yeXaYSqmtK8/s320/LW%2Bfor%2Breal%2Bthis%2Btime.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">#LaborWhispering<br />
Image created using Canva</td></tr>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-size: large;"><i>I am pleased to announce that I will be offering Labor Whispering sessions in Sugar Land and the Southwest Houston area beginning in 2016. </i></span><br />
<span style="color: #6aa84f;"><br style="background-color: white;" /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #6aa84f; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">So what is Labor Whispering?</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;">I'm glad you asked. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;">Labor Whispering is a birth modality d</span><span style="background-color: white;">eveloped by our very own <a href="http://urbancurandera.com/">Urban Curandera, Rowan TwoSisters</a>,</span><span style="background-color: white;"> </span><span style="background-color: white;">that unveils and addresses common blockages that can prevent labor from beginning in a timely manner. This is important because nearly everyone will be faced with the induction decision at some point during their pregnancies. In a perfect world, we would all go into labor on our own exactly when our bodies and our babies decide. The reality is that many Houston area care providers and hospital policies dictate, and reasons out of our control may necessitate, a medical induction of labor if labor does not begin within a certain time frame. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #6aa84f; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Labor Whispering is <b>NOT</b>:</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;"><i><b>An induction technique.</b></i> I am not a medical care provider. It is not my place to try to start the labor process. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;"><i><b>An opportunity to try to force a body into labor that isn't ready. </b></i></span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;"><i><b>Crazy doula voodoo magic.</b></i> Yes, I've been asked by a nurse to try some of my "Crazy doula voodoo magic" before.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;"><i style="font-weight: bold;">Just for hippies. </i>Shout out to fellow <a href="http://lourdesresendez.com/2015/11/labor-whisperer/">Labor Whisperer and Doula, Lourdes Resendez</a>, for reassuring us that Labor Whispering is not "Hippy dippy doula magic" and creating a super cool free printable. </span><br />
<span style="color: #6aa84f;"><br style="background-color: white;" /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #6aa84f; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Labor Whispering <b>IS</b>:</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;"><b><i>An opportunity to address "unfinished business."</i></b> Nursery not ready? Car seat not installed? Forgot to take a childbirth class? Haven't discussed "that thing" with your partner or care provider yet? Those things can hold a baby in. These things and more will be addressed at your Labor Whispering session. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;"><i><b>A chance to relax.</b></i> You will be enveloped in a nest of pillows and massaged by me, your partner, or both! Your choice. We want your muscles, mind, heart, and spirit to relaaaaaaax. We will encourage your own natural labor stimulating hormones to flow. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;"><b><i>A time to dig deep</i></b>. We are going to "go there" and talk about anything and everything that might be keeping baby in. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;"><i><b>An opportunity to learn.</b></i> Learn about yourself, your partner, exercises for optimal fetal positioning, and relaxation.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;"><b><i>A chance to release.</i></b> Blockages, tears, tension, you name it. This will be a chance for oxytocin to flood your system with wonderful loving feelings. Let the oxytocin and tears flow. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #6aa84f;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Labor Whispering sessions take place in the comfort of your own home and last around two hours.</span> </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-size: large;"><b>Cost: $200</b></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;">Trained <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/LaborWhispering/">Labor Whisperers are all over Houston</a>. Find a Labor Whisperer near you. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><b>Book your session today!</b></span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-84332012346619900632015-12-10T07:52:00.000-08:002015-12-10T09:50:47.218-08:00It's okay if you didn't breastfeed<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-OsgPsoFVvRM/VmmeZNTcRPI/AAAAAAAABjQ/up1ZsJ4g440/s1600/It%2527s%2Bokay%2Bif%2Byou%2Bdidn%2527t%2Bbreastfeed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-OsgPsoFVvRM/VmmeZNTcRPI/AAAAAAAABjQ/up1ZsJ4g440/s320/It%2527s%2Bokay%2Bif%2Byou%2Bdidn%2527t%2Bbreastfeed.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image created using Canva</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white;"><b><i>Can I let you in on a little secret? </i></b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">I get lonely sometimes. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">Ok. A lot. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">I miss having the freedom to just go out with friends at the drop of a hat for a hot chocolate and good conversation. I miss feeding my soul with good friends who love me, uplift me, and think I am cool at a moment's notice. I miss having a grown-up conversation without it being punctuated with, "Stop that! Don't touch that! Mommy's talking. Where did you bonk? Stop hitting your sister!" I have some really awesome friends that it has been way too <strike>many kids</strike> long between visits. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: blue; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">I miss friends.</span></span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">I've always been a little different from my friends, though. When we went out for coffee, I ordered hot chocolate. When we went out for drinks, I ordered cookies and milk. True story. I didn't let the fact that we made different choices stop me from loving the heck out of them. I'm like a puppy. If you're nice to me, I like you. That's pretty much all it takes. If you show an interest in me, I'll want to keep you forever. Although I'm past the days of following people home. Mostly.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">Things changed for me when I became a mom. Making friends became harder. There have been too many times when I am getting to know someone, feel like we are hitting it off, and they look at me sadly to say something like, "Well, I didn't breastfeed." Or, "I didn't have a natural birth." Or, "I could never have a home birth."</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">It seems like sometimes people feel the need to offer an explanation to me. Almost like, "Yes, we are having a great time, but there's something you need to know about me before we take this to the next level. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">I didn't breastfeed."</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://lourdesresendez.com/2015/12/dear-bottle-feeding-mom-fedisbest/">It's okay that you didn't breastfeed</a> (have a natural birth, home birth, etc.). Actually, it is more than okay. It is so okay, it is unbelievable how okay it is. In fact, I don't really care. Unless you are hurting about it. Then I want to listen, listen, and listen some more. I want to be a safe space while you share your hurt. I don't want to offer any advice. I probably wouldn't have any, anyway. I may ask you if I can hug you, but that's really all I've got. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">There's no need to offer me any explanations. I'm not judging you.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: blue; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Passionate. Yes. Judgmental. No.</span><span style="font-family: inherit;"> </span></span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">If you want to get me on a soapbox, mention vaginal exams. But if you loved yours, more power to you. Rock on with your fabulous vaginal exams. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><b><i>I promise I know how to be passionate about something without judging you for choosing differently. </i></b></span><br />
<br style="background-color: white;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">Let's be friends! Even if you didn't breastfeed. </span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-31497706582196298612015-12-01T07:19:00.000-08:002017-06-29T10:50:16.945-07:00Demand Better Treatment in Birth<div style="text-align: right;">
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<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-LaUxdj9TxVI/WVU9xJI133I/AAAAAAAABuw/75leBCs90wEKQaO1HT4Ke1aFMSHNvIZDwCLcBGAs/s1600/Demand%2BBetter%2BTreatment%2Bin%2BBirth.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="315" data-original-width="560" height="225" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-LaUxdj9TxVI/WVU9xJI133I/AAAAAAAABuw/75leBCs90wEKQaO1HT4Ke1aFMSHNvIZDwCLcBGAs/s400/Demand%2BBetter%2BTreatment%2Bin%2BBirth.png" width="400" /></a></div>
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I moved to Houston in the fall of 2009 to attend grad school at the University of Houston. My <br />
husband followed a semester later. We decided to make Houston our home, so we needed to take care of some paperwork in order to become official Texas residents. At the beginning of my final semester of grad school, newly pregnant, we needed to get some business taken care of that required the ever-dreaded visit to the DPS. I had to go by myself that day. I called ahead to make sure I had all the required paperwork. I didn't want to be sent home for something only to have to wait in line again.<br />
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I arrived, required paperwork in hand, pulled my number, and proceeded to wait. And wait.....and wait. My turn finally came. I walked up to the woman behind the counter to take care of my business.<br />
<br />
Guess what.<br />
<br />
I was missing something.<br />
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I insisted that I had called ahead to confirm that I had everything that I needed. She was about to quickly and nonchalantly dismiss me. After all, I was just one of many that day. Suddenly, unfamiliar with pregnancy hormones, I burst into tears. I blubbered something about, "Dadgum HUSBAND's business" and, "Pregnant," and the lady said, "Girl, you gotta take care of yourself. Hang on a second." She proceeded to walk to a back room for a few minutes. When she came back, everything was magically taken care of. I don't remember what she did, but I remember she mentioned a system where she could look up the information she needed from me without the "required" paperwork that I was told over the phone that I didn't actually need. (I have since learned to Just. Bring. Everything.)<br />
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I was thankful that she was able to help me without sending me back home, but I couldn't help but wonder, "Why did I have to cry first? If she could have just helped me the entire time, why was she so willing to send me back home first? Why not just provide that customer service in the first place?"<br />
<br />
Fast forward a few years to an experience I had at the dry cleaner. This time I had a toddler in hand, and I was pregnant. Again. My husband urgently needed his suit pants dry cleaned. I had accidentally washed them in our home washer, and now they were a shrunken, wrinkled mess. They were ruined. I was hoping they were salvageable enough to be repaired at the dry cleaner for one last needed hoorah the very next day. I called around and finally found where I needed to go. When I arrived, the man behind the counter insisted that he couldn't fit me in. Not even for just one pair of pants. There was absolutely no time. I remained stoic. I breathed. I tried to persuade him, but he was immovable.<br />
<br />
I walked back to my car, where I proceeded to burst into tears. I don't know how long I sat there just crying away, when I heard a tap at my window. It was the man behind the counter. He said, "Give me the pants. I can fit you in." I thanked him, and I asked him why he was helping me. He said, "Because you are crying."<br />
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Why, if he could have helped me the entire time, did he make me cry first? Why not just provide that customer service in the first place?<br />
<br />
Have you ever noticed that people don't seem to take you seriously until you get crazy first? Or is that just me?<br />
<br />
My husband and I talked about this just the other day. Why do our kids <i>insist </i>that we get crazy before they take us seriously? And why do we do that to each other? I said to my husband, "We both do it. Think of all the times that I try to be nice and try to be nice and try to be nice before I finally just hit you in the face with a frying pan." Bonus points if you get that Family Guy reference.<br />
<br />
Fast forward to last night's Birth Boot Camp class. In a previous class we discussed how <a href="http://evidencebasedbirth.com/evidence-based-fetal-monitoring/">continuous electronic fetal monitoring increases the c-section rate without improving fetal outcomes</a>. One of my students told me that she discussed this with her OB, and he agreed. They know this is true, but they insist on continuous electronic fetal monitoring anyway. Why? Because it is easier.<br />
<br />
At this point, I had to mention that women who <i>insist </i>on better treatment in birth tend to get it. They won't get it if they don't ask. It is an unfortunate truth that people will just "do what they always do" or do what is most convenient, regardless of whether or not it is in the best interest of their customer. If the customer doesn't ask for, or demand, better treatment, they won't get it.<br />
<br />
Do you want your insurance company to pay for your home birth? Be the squeaky wheel. Keep going up the chain until you get to someone who knows what they are talking about. Those first few gatekeepers are just that. They are there to keep you OUT and keep you from getting what you want.<br />
<br />
<b><i>Demand better treatment.</i></b><br />
<br />
Do you want to have intermittent monitoring rather than continuous monitoring? Discuss it with your care provider beforehand, and insist on it during labor.<br />
<br />
<i><b>Demand better treatment.</b></i><br />
<br />
Do you feel like your care provider is fighting you every step of the way?<br />
<br />
<b><i>Demand better treatment.</i></b><br />
<br />
Demand with your wallet, and take your business elsewhere if you need to. If your care provider does not want to support you in the type of birth you are seeking, you will not change his or her mind. <a href="http://keendoula.blogspot.com/2015/11/birth-boot-camp-class-3-setting-up-camp.html">Choose are care provider who supports the type of birth you want</a>. They are out there!<br />
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<b><i><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">Demand better treatment. You and your baby deserve it.</span></i></b></div>
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Want to learn more about all of your options for having an amazing birth? Take a Birth Boot Camp class! There are <a href="http://www.houstonbbci.com/">Birth Boot Camp classes all over the Houston area</a>.<br />
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Learn more about <a href="http://improvingbirth.org/">Improving Birth</a> and how women are demanding better treatment in birth all over the U.S.<br />
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Learn more about <a href="http://improvingbirth.org/2015/09/the-price-of-apathy/">why consumers need to care about demanding better treatment in birth</a>.<br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-24933825978402510872015-11-17T08:18:00.001-08:002015-11-17T10:58:04.973-08:0010 Ways to Play with Kids for Moms who Hate to Play<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
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<span style="background-color: white;">I have a hard time playing with my kids. I get bored easily, especially when my kids usually just want me to watch them play rather than actually play. As soon as I divert my gaze to something else, like my phone or a book, they climb all over me. They want me to just sit there. All day. Watching them have fun. Doing nothing else. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;">Last week, I took to the internet to ask my mom friends for ideas on how I could enjoy playing with my kids. The responses surprised me. Instead of ideas, I got a lot of exclamations of, "Me too!" I also received a lot of encouraging responses. I don't have to enjoy playing with my kids. That's what other kids are for! I'm still a great mom even if I don't enjoy playing with my kids. I can show love in other ways. The wonderful women who responded helped me to realize that I am still a great mom even if I don't enjoy playing with kids. They also helped me to realize all of the other cool things I do with my kids already. I'm not such a bad mom after all! They helped me to come up with this list of 10 ways to play with kids for moms who hate to play.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #45818e; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: x-large;"><b>1. Set a timer. </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">I have a hard time being fully present during my time with the kids. I worry about all the stuff I need to do when I am trying to spend time with them. I've learned how to play with my kids in small spurts. I say things like, "I will play with you until the timer goes off, but then I have to wash dishes," or, "I need to work until the timer goes off. Then I will play with you." </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b><span style="color: #45818e;">2. Let them help.</span> </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">My kids love to help me around the house. I don't know about you, but it is so hard for me to enjoy spending time with my kids when there is still work to be done. My solution is to let my kids help. They love to help unload the dishwasher, rake leaves, or fold clothes. </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">It usually does make the chore take longer, but it helps on those days when there is a lot to do.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #45818e; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>3. Visit indoor play areas.</b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">I really don't like chasing after my kids. I had a few experiences with my oldest when she was a toddler that have left me with anxiety about wide-open outdoor places. Since then indoor places have been my friend. I still have to watch them like a hawk to be sure they don't escape, but I'm not quite as anxious as I am at parks. My kids love to play at a Chikfila or McDonald's play area, but our favorite is the <a href="http://sugarcreek.net/sugarland/children/playscape/">Playscape at Sugar Creek Baptist Church in Sugar Land.</a></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">Check out: <a href="http://stompinggroundsplayland.com/">Stomping Grounds in Sugar Land</a> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Also: </span><a href="http://majestkids.com/" style="font-family: inherit;">Majestkids Playland in Sugar Land</a><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #45818e; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>4. Visit parks. </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">I still take my kids to the park, but I prefer to take them to parks that seem a little more contained. My favorite <a href="http://www.sugarlandtx.gov/index.aspx?nid=110">parks in Sugar Land</a> are Eldridge Park and Sugar Land Park by Sugar Land Middle School. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #45818e; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>5. Exercise with them. </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">My kids joined me on all of my daily walks throughout my third pregnancy. I strapped the toddler in the stroller, and my preschooler walked with me. She kept up really well too! She'd run ahead sometimes and wait for me to catch up. Now she is one of the fastest kids in her class. It is one of the most adorable things to watch my kids do yoga or </span>Pilates<span style="font-family: inherit;"> with me. I get jealous when it is so easy for them. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #45818e; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>6. Have bath time.</b></span></span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">It is pretty sad how long it took me to figure out that bath time isn't necessarily just for taking baths. Now that my kids are old enough to take baths independently, I can let them play in the tub when I need to catch up on things. Sometimes my kids climb in the shower with me when I'm taking a shower. It is a win for all involved. The kids climb in, I get a shower, and the kids think I'm playing with them.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #45818e; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>7. Visit the library. </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">We love Toddler Time at the <a href="http://www.fortbend.lib.tx.us/">Fort Bend County Libraries!</a> We go as often as our schedule allows. All I have to do is make sure that my kids don't escape, and sit back while the teachers sing songs, read books, and share crafts with them. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #45818e; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>8. Snuggle up and read books. </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">I am a master at reading books with my kids. This is my favorite thing to do with them. Our current favorite is <i>If You Give a Mouse a Cookie</i>. </span></span><span style="background-color: white;">I'm also a really great snuggler. I'd enjoy it more if my toddler could JUST SNUGGLE without wiggling incessantly. Snuggling with her makes my stress melt away when she is able to be still. </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"> We love to snuggle up and read books together.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #45818e; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>9. Sing songs. </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">We sing lots of songs. Everything becomes a song. We sing when we clean up. We sing when we brush teeth. I even sing them a song about "wiping butts" during diaper changes. (I didn't say they were GOOD songs.) Our current favorites are Bingo and Little Bunny Foo Foo. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #45818e; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>10. Attend play dates. </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">For a mom who has a hard time playing with kids, play dates are a lifesaver! Not only do they allow for adult conversation, but the kids *mostly* entertain each other. All I have to do is help settle disputes sometimes. </span><br style="background-color: white;" /><br style="background-color: white;" /><span style="background-color: white;">I loved that the biggest takeaway I got from asking my mom friends how to play with my kids is that I am enough! Who I am and what I have to offer my kids is enough. <a href="http://brenebrown.com/">Brene Brown</a> would be proud. </span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-67946211573927867282015-11-09T08:43:00.000-08:002017-06-29T11:29:02.238-07:00What if they laugh at me for needing a C-Section?<span style="background-color: white; color: #38761d;"><span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">I have given birth three times, and all three times I have been afraid of having a c-section.</span><span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">This isn't an unusual fear. Most of the women who enroll in my Birth Boot Camp classes or interview me as their doula list having a C-section as one of their biggest fears for their upcoming birth. Most women I meet prefer to give birth vaginally, whether or not they are planning a completely un-medicated birth. I'm in good company when I say I am afraid of having a C-section.</span><br style="background-color: white;" /><br style="background-color: white;" /><span style="background-color: white;"><i><span style="font-size: large;"><u>I hear many reasons for the fear:</u></span></i></span></span><br />
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<li><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It is major abdominal surgery </span></span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It requires a longer recovery time</span></span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">They are worried about being able to bond with their baby</span></span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> They worry about potential breastfeeding trouble</span></span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> They want a large family and don't want to potentially limit the size of their family by having a c-section (most of my clients are first time moms who realize that <a href="http://www.mamabirth.com/2010/12/first-birth-no-do-overs-currently.html?m=1">the first birth will set the stage for all future births</a>)</span></span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> They fear missing out on a pivotal experience of womanhood</span></span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">They want to experience birth as "it was meant to be" (not my words, just something I hear a lot)</span></span></li>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">My reasons for wanting to avoid a c-section evolved over the course of my childbearing years.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="color: purple;">During my first pregnancy, it wasn't so much that I feared a c-section, but that I really wanted to have a natural birth.</span> </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">A c-section would be the complete opposite of what I wanted. I'm not proud to admit this, but I was scared that I would feel like a failure if I had a c-section. I had this feeling that people expected me to fail at natural birth. That, maybe, they even <i><b>wanted </b></i>me to fail. Of course, of COURSE, I would consent to surgery, if my baby needed it. I just really hoped I wouldn't need to, and I did everything in my power to avoid needing a surgical birth. Luckily, with the support of my amazing husband, I managed to avoid a C-section AND have the natural birth I desired. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">For my second pregnancy, I worried about having a c-section for prideful reasons. </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">By this time, I'd been a birth doula for nearly two years, and I was planning to certify to teach Birth Boot Camp classes, which are geared toward couples planning a natural childbirth. It was no secret that <a href="http://keendoula.blogspot.com/2014/03/maybe-you-dont-need-natural-childbirth.html">I felt pretty awesome that I managed to have a natural childbirth</a>. Me! A dainty flutist! It was also no secret that I thought natural childbirth was the bee's knees. What would it look like if I, a birth junkie/doula/aspiring childbirth educator, ended up with a Cesarean? Well, certainly it would look like I got what I deserved for thinking so highly of myself for having a natural childbirth and for putting natural childbirth on a pedestal. Certainly " they" would be happy to see me knocked down a peg or two. </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Pride. I feared my pride would be hurt. </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">Recently, during my third pregnancy, that old familiar C-section fear came back. There were a few new elements to this fear, however. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: large;"><u>First, I had <i><b>confidence</b></i>.</u></span><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><i><b>Confidence</b></i> that if I should need a C-section, it was because it was necessary. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><b><i>Confidence </i></b>in my midwife, that she would know when a transport was necessary. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><b><i>Confidence</i></b> in my doula, that she would support me No. Matter. What. That she wouldn't be one of the ones who laughed at me for needing a C-section. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><b><i>Confidence</i></b> in my husband, that he would advocate for our baby and me. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">But mostly <b><i>confidence in myself,</i></b> that I would know under which circumstances a C-section was truly necessary. I had <i><b>confidence in my body</b></i> that it worked, that it was capable of amazing things, and that a C-section only meant that <b><i><u>this baby needed to be born this way</u></i></b>, not that there was a defect with my body. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: large;"><u>Second, I wasn't worried about the surgery itself, or about the physical recovery. I was terrified of the <i>emotional recovery</i>.</u></span> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I've seen how heartbreaking it has been for so many women, and I was afraid I wasn't strong enough to handle that aspect of recovery. I've battled a </span>tendency<span style="font-family: inherit;"> toward negativity my entire life. I was really scared that if I needed a C-section, it would be one more thing I had to work really hard at being positive about. I didn't know if I had it in me. </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: large;"><u>Finally, the pride was still there.</u></span> </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #38761d;"><span style="color: purple; font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">What if they laughed at me for needing a C-section?</span><span style="font-family: inherit;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I finally admitted that old ugly feeling to my doula, and she said the perfect thing to help that fear go away for good. This right there, people, is why doulas need doulas too and why I couldn't doula myself. I believe getting all those fears out in the open helped me to have a better birth experience than I would have without it. Processing fears is an important part of preparing to give birth, no matter what kind of birth one is planning. </span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-69446089126144208162015-11-04T09:17:00.000-08:002015-11-04T10:06:56.082-08:00The rebozo chooses the doula<div style="text-align: center;">
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I attended a wonderful birth several months ago and ended up getting vernix on my rebozo. As these things tend to happen, it was no big deal. After I washed it, I laid it out to dry on our deck in the warm sun. As I was on hands and knees smoothing out the wrinkles in my rebozo, I couldn't help but think of how my actions were like a thanks offering I was making to the birth goddess for allowing for such a beautiful birth experience. I don't actually worship any birth goddesses, but it seemed to be such a sacred moment to me. I was deeply thankful that the birth I had attended had turned out to be such a great experience for that family. I couldn't help but think that tenderly smoothing out my rebozo in the warm sun was my humble offering of gratitude. I love my rebozo. It is more than just a piece of cloth to me. It is sacred.<br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I fell in love with the rebozo at my first doula training. Before I started purchasing items to include in my doula bag, I knew I had to have a rebozo. A real one. I wish I could describe what it means to me. It has been on quite a journey with me as I have learned how to support birthing families during one of the most special times of their lives. It has been a companion. If I ever stopped doing birth work, I imagine the only thing I would keep to remember this wonderful season of my life is my rebozo. I could never let it go. It has become a part of me. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I am also a musician, and I carry a lot of supplies in my flute bag: my flute, metronome, sheet music, pencils, tuner, and cleaning supplies. Out of all of those things, my flute is the most important to me. I could never get rid of my flute. It is a part of me. My rebozo is like my flute. I could teach a flute lesson without ever playing a note on my flute, but it HAS to be there right next to me in case I need it. I COULD use a cheaper model in a pinch, but I won't. My flute helps me do my best work. It is the same with my rebozo. I don't always use it, but I need it to be there just in case I need it. It has to be MY rebozo. Not only is it a birth tool, but it has a history. It means something. My rebozo has attended many births with me, and it brings the strength of the women who made it and the strength of the women who have birthed in its presence to every birth I attend.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I've had my flute for 14 years. During that time I've tried lots of other flutes. In all that time, I have NEVER found a flute that I like better than mine. It is THE ONE. Mr. Olivander had it right. Just like the wand chooses the wizard, the flute chooses the flutist. It is the same with my rebozo. </span><br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-33324306816474586142015-10-27T06:54:00.000-07:002015-10-27T06:54:21.292-07:00Awesome OBs in Sugar Land, TXAs a doula serving in Houston and Sugar Land, I have the opportunity to meet many OBs and midwives in our area. The OBs at <a href="http://www.chistlukeshealth.org/caritas-womens-care">Caritas Women's Care</a> have provided such wonderful care to my clients that I am beyond delighted to share that they've moved their practice to Sugar Land! The <a href="http://birthbootcamp.com/">childbirth classes that I teach here in Sugar Land</a> are based on the <a href="http://motherfriendly.org/MFCI/">Mother-Friendly Childbirth Initiative</a>, and everything I have witnessed from these incredible OBs has been nothing but Mother-Friendly care.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image Credit: www.facebook.com/CHIStLukes</td></tr>
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Here is what a few of my former clients have to say about these awesome OBs:</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-H0AISpQ3AmQ/Vi9_JP2dpUI/AAAAAAAABgY/74WoSR8I5Vs/s1600/jamelka%2Btestimonial.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-H0AISpQ3AmQ/Vi9_JP2dpUI/AAAAAAAABgY/74WoSR8I5Vs/s640/jamelka%2Btestimonial.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image created using Canva</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OG_Ca9_pzA0/Vi9_JP4CZTI/AAAAAAAABgc/apOcYycVh8s/s1600/karges%2Btestimonial.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OG_Ca9_pzA0/Vi9_JP4CZTI/AAAAAAAABgc/apOcYycVh8s/s640/karges%2Btestimonial.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image created using Canva</td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Welcome to Sugar Land, Dr. Karges, Dr. Jamelka, and Dr. Hernandez! </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">We are so glad you are here!</span></div>
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-33205981579487811452015-10-19T20:32:00.001-07:002017-11-30T09:24:59.416-08:005 Things I Learned About Birth During an Orchestra Audition<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Yesterday I auditioned for the second flute spot in the Lake Charles Symphony Orchestra. I've spent the past three weeks preparing for this audition. I knew right from the start that I wanted to try to relate this audition journey to birth somehow. Here are 5 things I learned about BIRTH during an orchestra audition. </b></span></i></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><i><b>1.<span style="font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->It takes a lot of preparation</b></i></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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I’ve been playing flute for years. I have a Master’s Degree
in flute performance. I've spent MANY hours in a practice room preparing for
future auditions and performances. I haven’t been able to practice so much
since I’ve become a mother, but I practiced as much as time would allow to
prepare for this audition. I wouldn’t haven’t have had a shot without
preparation.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>2.<span style="font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Affirmations help</i></b></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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Right before I walked into the audition room, I said to
myself, “I am strong! I am capable! I can do hard things! I can birth this baby…I
mean play this flute…with confidence!” And it really helped to affirm the good
things that were happening while I was playing. I thought, “Yes! Nailed it! Oh, that went WAY better than I expected! Oh, that was great! You’re doing so well!”
On the way to the audition, I kept thinking to myself, “I can be happy no
matter the outcome.” Which leads me to….<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>3.<span style="font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->I can still do “everything right” and not have
the outcome I want</i></b></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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I did everything I could to prepare for this audition. It
wasn’t easy. I had to practice in ways that I’ve never had to before. I
practiced with a baby attached to me most of the time and often had a toddler running
around my feet. But I did my absolute best to prepare, and I did my best at the
audition. Elements out of my control kept me from winning the audition. I did
better than I expected, but I didn’t actually get the spot. However….<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>4.<span style="font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->I can still be happy if things don’t go as
planned</i></b></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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My biggest worry about this audition was not that I wouldn’t
get the spot, but how I would feel if I didn’t get the spot. I was so worried
about being upset, angry, or feeling like I wasted my time, but I feel none of
those things. I am so glad to learn that I actually AM capable of still being
happy even if things don’t go as planned. That is a big deal to me to know that
I’ve made progress on something that I’ve struggled with for many years.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>5.<span style="font-stretch: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->I can do amazing things when I set my mind to it</i></b></span></div>
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No, I didn’t win, but you know what? I’m still amazing! I
prepared for an audition and kicked the audition’s butt! (Shout out to my <a href="http://www.nolanesting.com/amanda">Birth Boot Camp DOULA trainer</a> and her client who kicked labor’s butt!) I had so many moments of
frustration preparing for this audition. I got angry many times. I wanted to
quit. I allowed the negative voices in my head to camp out and attack my
confidence. But I stayed the course and accomplished something that makes me
feel very proud of myself. I didn’t win the race, but I feel amazing that I
finished it!<o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-56371457712469339122015-10-11T16:04:00.002-07:002015-10-11T16:04:43.932-07:00Why We Love Our Houston Area Midwives {Part Two}<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zAJCWep9_ZY/VhreBfITxhI/AAAAAAAABfk/DWZQTVG_ESQ/s1600/We%2Blove%2Bour%2BHouston%2Bmidwives.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="268" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zAJCWep9_ZY/VhreBfITxhI/AAAAAAAABfk/DWZQTVG_ESQ/s320/We%2Blove%2Bour%2BHouston%2Bmidwives.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image created using Canva</td></tr>
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<i>We have amazing midwives in the Houston area. When I asked for help writing this post</i><i> in honor of National Midwifery Week (October 4-10, 2015)</i><i> about why we love our <a href="http://houstonmidwives.org/">Houston Area midwives</a>, I was so overwhelmed with responses I needed to write two posts. You can <a href="http://keendoula.blogspot.com/2015/10/why-we-love-our-houston-area-midwives.html">read Part One here</a>.</i><br />
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"I love my midwife because she sincerely cared and informed me so I can have the birth I wanted. Thank you <a href="http://www.houstoncertifiedmidwife.com/">Shannon Stellhorn</a>."<br />
-Liana Rodriguez<br />
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"I love both of my midwives because they were always the calm in the storm, reminding me to find my own inner strength!!"<br />
-Meleah Ekstrand<br />
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"I love my midwives because they trusted my body and my intuition. Their faith in me made my 2VBAC of a 10 lb 3 oz baby one of the most enjoyable and empowering moments in my entire life. Thank you, Alyson Kuntz-Butler and Patricia Wilkinson Ghaly of <a href="https://www.facebook.com/MagnoliaBirthCenter">Magnolia Blossom Birth Center.</a>"<br />
-Angela Fagg, <a href="http://www.mybirthmatters.com/">Houston area doula</a><br />
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"I love my team of midwives. They helped keep me on track emotionally and physically during the pregnancy, assured me that I could do it both times...got me back on track when I was overwhelmed and scared...they made me feel safe. Love y'all, <a href="http://www.katybirthcenter.com/">Natalie, Melissa, and Chelsea!</a>"<br />
-Rebecca Greer<br />
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"I love my midwife because she talks to me like a person. She puts my mind at ease by putting herself in my shoes and sharing her knowledge with understanding and respect. When I arrive to an appointment, they know my name and my story, and they're really good at pretending to care. (Just kidding!) <a href="https://www.facebook.com/MagnoliaBirthCenter">Patricia Wilkinson Ghaly</a> and her team at <a href="http://www.magnoliabirthcenter.com/">Magnolia Blossom Birth Center</a> are lovely people, and I'll never be able to show them enough gratitude for their big part in my 2VBAC."<br />
-Jill Solis<br />
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"I love my midwife because until I met her, I was sure I was too weak to give my baby and myself a peaceful, natural birth. Because I was so afraid after two invasive, damaging hospital births that had taught me not to trust my own body. I love her because she never doubted that I could see it through my long pregnancy, that she never let myself wallow in my fears and worries. I love her because she trusted my body even when I didn't, and believed my body when it was time to deliver even when I still doubted. I love her because she supported me through my worst contractions and didn't let me give up. When I got scared, when I was exhausted in every way, when I was positive I couldn't push anymore, she raised her voice when I needed it and told me to NOT STOP. And somehow she helped me find the strength inside to finish what I had started. I love her because I delivered my 10 pound 6 ounce baby boy without any tearing or damage. I love her because she wasn't even surprised that I had been able to do it. She knew I could, and I did. I know what I'm capable of now because she helped me realize it. Because of her help and guidance, wisdom, and support, I had a beautiful birth I won't look back on with regret or fear. I'm forever thankful."<br />
-Tara Porter-Duke<br />
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"In a moment of feeling completely discouraged, she knew I needed her to be there with me to keep me moving and believing in myself. Because we had spent so much time together before the baby was born, she knew what to say and what NOT to say to keep me focused."<br />
-Helenita F., attended by <a href="http://www.westhoustonbirthcenter.com/holly-shearman/">midwife Holly Shearman</a><br />
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"I love my midwife because she helped me feel empowered, respected, and at peace during my birth."<br />
-Katy Wentworth<br />
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"I love my midwife because she supported my VBAC and never doubted my ability to VBAC."<br />
-Jennifer Lankford Rico<br />
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"I love my midwife because she makes me feel safe. And she will be one of the few people present to witness my baby's first minutes in this world--how very momentous, and how very impossible not to love those special people, including her."<br />
-Holly Milkowski, Houston blogger, <a href="http://mamasmilknochaser.com/">Mama's Milk, No Chaser</a><br />
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"I love my midwife because she is so skilled, intuitive, smart, understanding, and kind. I never felt like a name on a list. I felt so well cared for, as if I were a friend of her, that she would do anything she could to help."<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LtOeHg8wEck/VhrlTd0qyTI/AAAAAAAABf4/mzJNJLWalRQ/s1600/She%2Blistens%2Bto%2Bme.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="268" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LtOeHg8wEck/VhrlTd0qyTI/AAAAAAAABf4/mzJNJLWalRQ/s320/She%2Blistens%2Bto%2Bme.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
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-Anne Lanham, attended by <a href="http://www.westhoustonbirthcenter.com/">midwife Holly Shearman</a><br />
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"I love my midwife because she is a friend. She believed in me and helped me bring my beautiful baby girl earth side at a home water birth."<br />
-Krystal O,, attended by <a href="http://www.houstoncertifiedmidwife.com/">midwife Shannon Stellhorn</a><br />
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"I love my midwives because: My first midwife gave me the confidence that I could wait to have my baby, and I could birth without tearing. And I didn't need a c-section just because I had been in longer for longer than 12 hours.<br />
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The 2nd midwife helped my husband help me. Giving us more of a bonding experience while having a baby.<br />
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Our 3rd midwife gave us the courage and understanding that we could birth by ourselves. (She missed the birth.)<br />
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Our 4th midwife gave me tricks and the opportunity to learn about my baby that was so laid back that I had to have her listen to my baby almost every day. She never got upset. She never showed that she was frustrated. She was always there within minutes to put my worries to rest. Then she came when most others were hunkered down during a blizzard!<br />
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Our 5th & 6th babies' midwife lived just around the corner from us, and I loved having her apprentices being able to come and help me out! I loved how she encouraged me to study midwifery!<br />
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Our 6th midwife (8th baby) was a life saver, literally! Because she didn't blink an eye when I had complications that my OB insisted should have killed my baby. That baby is healthy and doing great!"<br />
-Cristina Bennett<br />
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"She listens to me!"<br />
-Emily Jones<br />
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"I love my midwife because she was always there for me. She empowered me and supported my decisions. She is so very knowledgeable and kindhearted. I felt 100% safe in her care. She believed in me and knew the right time to suggest necessary interventions so I could still accomplish my VBAC. She has an innate intuition about birth. So thankful for my midwife being the calm in the storm and helping me accomplish my VBAC. I couldn't have done it without her."<br />
-Roseana Hinds, attended by <a href="http://www.houstoncertifiedmidwife.com/">midwife Shannon Stellhorn</a><br />
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"She trusts my body as much as I do!"<br />
-Ashley Musil, <a href="http://www.wellspringmidwife.com/">Houston area midwife</a><br />
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"I love my midwife because she saw me through the two hardest times in my life. <a href="http://inbloommidwifery.com/">Jaymee Jamison Boughton</a>, miss you sweet friend!"<br />
-Elizabeth W.<br />
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"I love my midwife because she makes me feel as if she is a partner in my care decisions rather than a dictator over them."<br />
-Tonya Newman<br />
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"I love my midwife because she informed, encouraged, empowered, and fully supported me the entire length of my pregnancy and birth."<br />
-Kimberly MacRae<br />
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Houston families love their midwives! You can learn more about midwives and how they can help you have an AMAZING birth in <a href="http://www.houstonbbci.com/">childbirth classes throughout the Houston area.</a><br />
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THANK YOU to all who contributed to this post and to the midwives who helped during these amazing births!<br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-41838620781062724312015-10-11T13:58:00.001-07:002015-10-11T16:05:49.885-07:00Why We Love Our Houston Area Midwives {Part One}<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zAJCWep9_ZY/VhreBfITxhI/AAAAAAAABfk/DWZQTVG_ESQ/s1600/We%2Blove%2Bour%2BHouston%2Bmidwives.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="268" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zAJCWep9_ZY/VhreBfITxhI/AAAAAAAABfk/DWZQTVG_ESQ/s320/We%2Blove%2Bour%2BHouston%2Bmidwives.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
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<i>Houston area families have many options available to them when it comes to deciding how they want to welcome their babies into the world. One of the many decisions families need to make is who will attend them during their special day. We have a thriving community of talented and caring <a href="http://houstonmidwives.org/">midwives in the Houston area</a>, and we are excited to tell anyone and everyone who is willing to listen how much we love them. When Sarah Clarke, Curriculum Developer over at Birth Boot Camp, asked instructors <a href="http://birthbootcamp.com/why-women-love-their-midwives/">why we love our midwives</a> in order to write a post celebrating National Midwifery Week, I asked her if I could write a Houston edition. I asked for testimonials in two local pregnancy boards, and there was no shortage of enthusiastic responses. There was so much love shown to our local midwives that I had to break the responses up into two parts. <a href="http://keendoula.blogspot.com/2015/10/why-we-love-our-houston-area-midwives_11.html">Read Part Two here</a>.</i><br />
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"I love my midwife because she made me feel worthy, loved, and empowered! She will forever be my friend."<br />
-Tamie Fugleberg, attended by <a href="https://m.facebook.com/ASacredJourneyMidwiferyServices">midwife Shannon Stellhorn</a><br />
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"I love my midwife because the model of care made me feel like a person, not a file, and she held space with me while I labored and never questioned me."<br />
-Kimberly Ramos, <a href="http://mydoulaoblongata.wix.com/mydoulaoblongata">Houston area doula</a><br />
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"I love my midwife because she truly cared about me as a person, as a woman, as a mother, and as a patient. And I love my midwife because I delivered my own baby and she was happy and delighted to attend me as I gave birth- exactly what birth attendants should do!"<br />
-Camille Parker Grow<br />
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"I love my midwife because she has given me back my right to birth as I please and has filled me with so much knowledge. She is more than a midwife; she is family and love."<br />
-Candice Shaunesey<br />
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"I could go on all day... Because she listens to me! Because she believes in me!"<br />
-Michelle Mallory<br />
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"I love my midwife because she listened to me. I love her because she trusted in my instincts and intuition. I love her because of her faith in the process of birth. I love her because she treated my husband and I like people and not lab rats. I love her because she gave me options. I could go on all day. <a href="https://m.facebook.com/ASacredJourneyMidwiferyServices">Shannon Stellhorn</a> is amazing, and I am so grateful to have had her for my daughter's birth.<br />
-Jasmine Theriot<br />
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"She respected what I needed."<br />
-Sara P.<br />
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"I love my midwife because she trusts that I am a responsible, smart adult that is capable of making the right decisions for me and my family."<br />
-Holly L.<br />
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"Because she acknowledges not only the whole me but also my family. She involves the soon-to-be older siblings and takes the time to truly be present in both the prenatal care and the birth."<br />
-Melissa Nealy, <a href="https://m.facebook.com/profile.php?id=102250669862548&tsid=0.9618024667724967&source=typeahead">Houston La Leche League Leader</a><br />
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"I love <a href="http://www.houstoncertifiedmidwife.com/">Shannon Stellhorn</a> because she believes in me and my body and respects my birth!!"<br />
-Amy E.<br />
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"I love my midwife because she cares. Because her care goes beyond the physical and into the holistic. I love my midwife because she practices with heart and evidence AND she knows I make every decision after education. I love my midwife because she is about family, and mine matters to her. I love my midwife because the way she poured into me has allowed me to pour into others. I love my midwife because I can NOW describe myself as beautiful, powerful, worthy, smart, whole, capable, loved."<br />
-Andie Wyrick<br />
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"I love my midwife because she treated me like a person, not a baby incubator. I love her because she empowered me to have a healing VBAC and supported me and believed in me every step of the way. She still does."<br />
-Maureen Knight, attended by <a href="https://m.facebook.com/ASacredJourneyMidwiferyServices">midwife Shannon Stellhorn</a><br />
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"I love my midwife because she took the time to not only care for my growing baby, but my emotional and mental well-being and even after the birth has still made sure I'm doing well."<br />
-PJ King Barnett<br />
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"I love my midwife...because she supported me through my whole labor. She stayed in the room with me while I labored (I've never had a provider do that before). She went out of her way to make sure I was comfortable. She helped me manage my breathing techniques when times got hard. She brought snacks and drinks to make sure I stayed hydrated. She empowered me to birth the way I wanted to. We both have a lot of the similar views on pregnancy and birth. Glad to call her, not just my midwife, but my friend."<br />
-Paula D Holland<br />
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"She provided quality education, mental and emotional support, and gave me space to listen to my intuition. She facilitated a birth experience that my heart knew was possible. And for that I am forever grateful."<br />
-Caitlin Crowell, attended by <a href="http://homebirthexperience.com/">midwife Kellie Moeller</a><br />
<br />
"I have birthed at home with two different Houston area midwives for three births and am preparing for my fourth home birth in January, and I loved working with both of my midwives. I love my midwives because they gave me all the information I would need to make evidence-based decisions regarding my prenatal care and delivery. I was spoken to as a person, not a number to be hustled through, and my emotions and time were valuable to them. I never felt anxious, leery, or in the dark about the information or procedures they offered/recommended. They encouraged, listened, explained, taught, and cared for me and my babies. They believed in my body's ability to do its work, and I trusted in their ability to recognize a problem beyond their scope of care, should it arise. Thank you, <a href="http://fruitfulvinemidwifery.com/">Natalie Wommack </a>and <a href="https://m.facebook.com/ASacredJourneyMidwiferyServices">Shannon Stellhorn</a> for being part of my births!"<br />
Rosie Kratti<br />
<br />
"I love my <a href="http://myhealthfreedom.com/">midwife, Chris Duffy</a>, and then student/now <a href="http://www.wellspringmidwife.com/">midwife, Ashley Musil,</a> because they only brought what was necessary: trust, skills, compassion, and love."<br />
-Jenna Keehnen, <a href="http://www.sbbirthservices.com/">Houston HypnoBirthing Practitioner</a><br />
<br />
"I love my midwife because it was finally MY birth. I made the choices. I had options. She helped give me the birth I'd always desired! I felt so comfortable and free around her."<br />
Veronica Davila, attended by <a href="https://www.facebook.com/Rite-of-Passage-Womens-Health-Birth-Center-123488701021313/timeline/">midwife Bernadette Olivier</a><br />
<br />
"She believed in me!"<br />
Abby M.<br />
<br />
You can learn about midwives and why more Houston families are choosing to have midwives attend their births in <a href="http://www.houstonbbci.com/">local childbirth classes</a>. Choosing a care provider who is supportive of the type of birth you want is the most important thing you can do to have an AMAZING birth.<br />
<br />
A huge THANK YOU goes out to all those who contributed to this post and the midwives who helped during these amazing births!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-69210698220729977462015-10-07T08:20:00.000-07:002015-10-07T08:20:43.222-07:00Houston Methodist Sugar Land Hospital Birthing Center TourA few years ago I attended a tour of the <a href="http://www.houstonmethodist.org/womens-services/locations/sugar-land/birthing-center/">Birthing Center at Houston Methodist Sugar Land Hospital</a> just in case I needed to transport to a hospital during my home birth. I ended up having a quick and peaceful home birth, but I am still glad that I took the time to see what area hospitals were like. Here are my impressions from a few years ago. Please let me know if any changes need to be made.<br />
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I signed up for a tour by calling the number provided on the website. I was able to speak to a Labor & Delivery nurse, who told me the days and times that tours were given. All I needed to do was show up during one of the designated times, and someone would show me around. I did not need to register to take a tour.<br />
<br />
When I arrived, a nurse showed me a Labor & Delivery room. I noticed the bathroom had a tub with a shower, so I asked if they could be used during labor. She said that the tub or shower could be used during labor as long as the care provider was okay with it. The monitors at the time were not water proof, so she mentioned that the shower could only be used while the monitors were off.<br />
<br />
How your baby will be monitored during labor is an important question to discuss with your care provider long before your big day. There are two options when it comes to electronic fetal monitoring: intermittent or continuous. Unless your doctor agrees with intermittent monitoring, continuous monitoring will be used. If Pitocin or any pain medications are being used, you must be on continuous fetal monitors.<br />
<br />
A wonderful reason to have water proof monitors is, not only can you use continuous<br />
monitoring in the shower, but if you are hooked up to Pitocin, you can still get in the shower. A few hospitals in the Houston area allow women to labor in the shower while hooked up to Pitocin because they have water proof monitors.<br />
<br />
Upon admission, you will be given an IV with fluids. Discuss with your care provider ahead of time if a saline lock is an option. This allows for more freedom of movement.<br />
<br />
Everyone except the partner/spouse must leave the room when an epidural is being administered. Most hospitals in the Houston area require <i>everyone</i>, including the partner/spouse, to leave when an epidural is being administered, so this is a rare treat.<br />
<br />
There are some <a href="http://keendoula.blogspot.com/2015/09/grab-your-balls-for-better-birth.html">birthing balls</a> available, but it would be best to bring your own to be sure one is available during your birthing time.<br />
<br />
There are no squatting bars available.<br />
<br />
There are mirrors available to use during pushing. Some women are motivated by being able to see the progress they are making during the pushing stage.<br />
<br />
You will stay in the same room for labor, delivery, and recovery. You will be moved to a postpartum room for the remainder of your stay.<br />
<br />
In the event of a Cesarean delivery, your baby will spend some time in the nursery. Only one support person is allowed in the room with you during a Cesarean delivery.<br />
<br />
Babies who are born vaginally will be placed directly on your chest for immediate skin to skin contact. Immediate skin to skin contact is unlikely to happen during a Cesarean delivery. However, check with your care provider as more places are beginning to offer more <a href="http://birthbootcamp.com/family-centered-cesarean/">Family-Centered Cesarean</a> deliveries.<br />
<br />
Most women will deliver in the supine position with their feet in stirrups. Sometimes women have support people to help hold their legs instead of using the stirrups. If you are interested in giving birth in any position other than the supine position, discuss options with your care provider ahead of time. Although it is possible, birthing in other positions is not typical in most Houston area hospitals.<br />
<br />
No matter what kind of birth you are planning on having, you will need to be prepared to advocate for yourself. Birth Boot Camp classes are a wonderful option for preparing couples to have an amazing birth. I teach the 10 week <a href="http://birthbootcamp.com/houston-birth-class/">childbirth classes in Sugar Land</a> on a regular basis. Check my website for upcoming class dates.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-34721783076807706772015-09-14T09:16:00.000-07:002015-09-14T09:19:29.387-07:005 Ways Giving Birth is Like Playing the FluteLast week was my first week back at teaching flute lessons, and I always spend that first week helping students "get the cobwebs out." Most of my students came to me feeling very tense. I don't blame them! They have a lot going on. I chuckled to myself as I realized I was telling them some of the same things that I say to women as they are giving birth. I marveled at how similar giving birth was to playing the flute. You may be wondering, "How in the world are the two similar?" Let me tell you.<br />
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<i><b><span style="font-size: large;">1. You need to relax your jaw.</span></b></i><br />
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Playing the flute requires a lot of open space inside of your mouth. I often tell students to imagine putting a hot boiled egg in their mouth. I also tell them to imagine a stack of Spree candies or sliced carrots between their back teeth. That helps them to get a feel for how apart their teeth need to be in order to produce a beautiful and resonant sound.<br />
<br />
When giving birth, your mouth and jaw are a reflection your cervix. If you want your cervix to open, you need to allow your jaw to relax open. It helps to vocalize with a nice, deep, OOOOOHHHH sound. Not only will vocalizing release endorphins to help with pain, the shape your mouth makes when you are making the OOOOOOHHHHH sound is exactly the kind of relaxation your jaw needs.<br />
<br />
I don't say this to my flute students, but open mouth equals open bottom.<br />
<br />
<b><i><span style="font-size: large;">2. You need to breathe.</span></i></b><br />
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It may be obvious that playing the flute requires air. We work on taking in deep breaths and blowing out for as long as we can. I am always working on ways to improve my breath support. I like to use the phrase, "Breathe like a person," for both flute lessons and when explaining to Birth Boot Camp students and doula clients on how to breathe during labor. There are no special tricks for how to breathe during labor. Some people like to breathe in through their nose and out through their mouth for as long as they can. There is no magic number to reach. Just do it for as long as is comfortable. But do remember to breathe! I know when I am in an uncomfortable situation, I sometimes forget to breathe. Once I realize it, that first deep breath in is so relaxing.<br />
<br />
<b><i><span style="font-size: large;">3. You need to relax your neck and shoulders.</span></i></b><br />
<br />
Many people hold tension in their neck and shoulders, and sometimes they do it without realizing it. I had to ask every single student last week, "Where are your shoulders? Are they up by your ears?" And every single one laughed and said, "Yes!" I spend a lot of time teaching my middle school students how to relax. We also spend time in each Birth Boot Camp class learning how to relax. Imagine, if my middle school students need to work on relaxation, adults preparing for one of the most important experiences of their lives can stand to spend some time working on relaxation.<br />
<br />
<i><b><span style="font-size: large;">4. You need to relax your eyebrows.</span></b></i><br />
<br />
I can tell when my flute students are having a hard time with something when they start furrowing their brow. Holding tension in your eyebrows, or anywhere in your face, wastes energy that you'll need later. As I mentioned earlier, clenching muscles in your face is a reflection of what your cervix is doing.<br />
<br />
<b><i><span style="font-size: large;">5. You need to find your rhythm.</span></i></b><br />
<br />
Penny Simkin wrote about the Three R's in her book <i>The Birth Partner</i>. I highly recommend this book for anyone preparing to give birth. Simkin writes that those women who cope the best during labor are doing three things:<br />
<br />
1. They find a <u>rhythm</u>.<br />
2. They find a <u>ritual</u>.<br />
3. They <u>relax</u> as much as possible.<br />
<br />
Playing the flute well definitely requires a good sense of rhythm.<br />
<br />
I used to wonder how in the world my background in music would help me be an effective doula until I started to notice that I say some of the same things to everyone! And now my doula works helps me be a more effective flute teacher. How fun!<br />
<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-50447219447922897912015-08-31T12:24:00.001-07:002015-12-29T09:30:33.673-08:00The One Thing You Should Pack in Your Hospital Bag That No One Will Tell You<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">I've had enough! I've had enough of reading the Facebook posts that say something like, </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">"</span></span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">I am at the hospital. My water is broken, and my labor has stalled. It has been (too many for their comfort) hours with no effective contractions, and they're pushing pitocin. What can I do to get contractions to pick up?" </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">The woman has usually been on continuous monitoring, hasn't had much rest or privacy, has been confined to the bed, and is being treated like a watched pot. I always just want to say, "Go hide in the bathroom (alone or with your partner, whichever is better), and use your vibrator."</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">Only she probably didn't pack one. No one ever packs one. Why don't people pack one? Everyone should pack one!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br style="background-color: white;" /><span style="background-color: white;">Recently, I read in the book <i>Orgasmic Birth, </i>that if you want to be assured of some privacy, pull out your vibrator and set it out alongside your other comfort measures tools. Can you imagine that scene? I've never witnessed it, but I'd love to see what would happen if a client said, "I need to go masturbate now." </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;">I've been to a few births where my intuition was telling me that the couple needed some oxytocin producing alone time together, and I made myself scarce for awhile so they could accomplish that. Only I would return to their room to find out that they never got privacy. They were bugged the entire time. I wish I was bold enough to say, "Hey! Go in the bathroom. Get in the shower with the lights low and masturbate." So here it is. "I think y'all would benefit from some alone time" is actually code for, "Go in the bathroom and masturbate." </span><br style="background-color: white;" /><br style="background-color: white;" /><span style="background-color: white;">I probably won't be able to be super blunt about my feelings about packing a vibrator because that is not my personality. I don't know everyone's history or feelings about sexuality. I wish everyone knew how sexuality and birth are related, but not everyone does. People have different levels of comfort around the topic of sex. Not everyone will pack a vibrator, much less consider using one. I don't want anyone to feel pressured to try it by being too forward about it.</span><br style="background-color: white;" /><br style="background-color: white;" /><span style="background-color: white;">And most people won't need it. Honestly, you know all those comfort measures taught in birth classes? Most people don't need most of those either. It's just that I would really love it to be packed for those "just in case" moments. You know the saying. It's better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it. </span><br style="background-color: white;" /><br style="background-color: white;" /><span style="background-color: white;">Pack your vibrators, people!</span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-19042453637220141822015-08-24T13:10:00.000-07:002015-08-24T13:23:35.136-07:00Last hoorah from the hoohah<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
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On Friday, July 24th, I woke up at around 8:15am to the sound of my girls' bedroom door opening. I rarely need an alarm clock anymore, especially during the summer. That morning we were planning on attending a friend's little boy's birthday party. We were also hoping to get some shopping done for groceries and last minute birth supplies. We were planning to get some major nesting done over the following week. After all, I was only 39 weeks pregnant, and I always go past my due date. Certainly this time would be no different. Plus my midwife was still out of town and wouldn't be arriving until very late the next day. The midwife that I had asked to be back-up had left that day as well. I had been referring to July 24th as my "Black Out Date" for about a week or so because under no circumstances could I have a baby that day. My baby HAD to stay in. Plus, it would anyway, since of COURSE I would make it to my due date.<br />
<br />
When I woke up, I didn't immediately jump out of bed or anything. I like to lounge if I can. The girls were being cooperative, so my husband and I lounged for a little while playing on our phones. I was feeling kind of crampy, so I headed to the bathroom to see if I could feel better. I wasn't too concerned because I had experienced cramping episodes for the two previous nights. They always ended up going away. After spending some time in the bathroom, I noticed the slightest tinge of pink on the toilet paper. It was so light, I thought maybe my eyes were deceiving me. I went back to snuggle in the bed for a little while longer. I told my husband what I noticed and started asking questions to <a href="http://villagebirthworks.com/">my doula</a> and Birth Boot Camp Doula group.<br />
<br />
At about 8:45am I posted this in my <a href="http://birthbootcamp.com/become-a-doula/">Birth Boot Camp Doula</a> group:<br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"My midwife is still out of town. Should be getting in tonight. Pink spotting this morning. What is that? My mucous plug? I've never noticed losing a mucous plug before. I'm pretty crampy, but I could still have days, right? I've still got some stuff to do. Besides the fact my midwife isn't back yet."</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">At that point I still thought she was getting in a day earlier than she actually was. Oops.</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I then texted my doula, "Pink spotting and cramps. No big deal right? Could still have days?"</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Then I complained, "I really don't have time for this today. I still have to buy some chux pads..."</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">She responded, "Shhhhh, you'll upset the birth gods!" </span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We have fun. We like to joke. We decided to just go about the day and check in periodically.</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I may have decided to try the bathroom one more time at this point. When I went back to the bedroom, the cramps were really starting to get on my nerves. I was complaining to my BBCD group that I had stuff to do today, that my midwife was still out of town, and that I hadn't written <a href="http://keendoula.blogspot.com/2015/08/how-to-not-stay-pregnant.html">this blog post</a> yet. It was a little after 9am at this point.</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Then one of the cramps made me need to lean over the bed and sway my hips. Robbie asked, "Are you going to have that baby?" I was adamant that, "No. I'm not having the baby. I just need these cramps to stop."</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">I think we decided that we should probably get the house cleaned up just in case we would have people coming over. I don't remember where he went, but I started putting away the laundry in my room. It was getting hard to do because I kept having to stop and lean over the bed during each cramp. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">About 15 minutes after we all decided to go about our day, I sent another message to my doula, "I don't know about this. This is new. I'm not prepared and trying to do stuff is making me uncomfortable."</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">She asked me to describe what I was feeling. I responded, "I'm not sure, but they might be starting to develop a pattern. I feel like a storm is brewing or something. I need to do the thing where it stops. How do people do that? I see it all the time! I'm drinking lots of water in case I'm dehydrated. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">Oh, and when the cramp goes away, it feels really good."</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">She then asks me which midwife was on call for me, which is good. I still wasn't sure about that. My midwife had left me with the name and number of another midwife just in case. I'd never met nor talked with her before. We agreed that I would start to time my "cramps" for the next hour to see what was going on there.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">I moved into the kitchen at about 9:30am to try to tackle the mess of dishes we left the night before. I</span><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"> sent a message to my primary midwife to ask her if I should give the other midwife a head's up that I was cramping and spottimg. I didn't get to see her response until much later.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">My husband started getting antsy and asking me what I wanted to do. I downloaded a contraction app and started timing. I forgot a few times, and it was hard to figure out exactly how long they were. They looked to be about 2-3 minutes apart according to the app. I had to keep stopping to sway and breathe through the "cramps." I don't remember the order of everything, but at some point, my husband called the midwife to let her know what was going on. She started to head our way. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">At around 10am or so, I remember washing a bowl and Robbie asking me what I wanted to do. I said I really wanted a shower because I felt gross. He said to go and that he would take care of the rest of the dishes. So off to the shower I went.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">I washed my hair and started crying because the cramps had me worried. I thought, "It is really going to suck once labor gets started." Robbie was in and out of the bathroom asking me what I needed. I remember him bringing me some water and my birth ball. He had also called everyone and let me know they were all on the way. They'd be there in about twenty minutes. I decided to see how much progress I could make in that time. I remember thinking, "Fine! I'll vocalize, then! Time to relax." I was really trying to resist vocalizing, but I just couldn't anymore. I was uncomfortable.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">I vocalized one good time, and I really felt the baby move down. I dropped to hands and knees. The intensity picked up. Robbie was telling me how great I was doing. I hit the wall and yelled, "I don't want to do this!" Robbie chuckled. Good thing I didn't hear it.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">I vocalized through a few more contractions when my water broke. I screamed, "My water broke!" I felt some burning and felt the baby's head coming out. I thought I screamed, "The head is coming out!" but apparently I was just screaming. At that point I started making peace with God because I thought the baby and I were about to die. I remember thinking, "I guess this is it then."</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">Then I felt a hand on my back and a voice saying, "I'm here." I rejoiced inside because I no longer feared death. My doula was here! She said the head was out and encouraged me to push. I pushed with all my might for what felt like ten minutes but was probably less than a minute and the baby was born. He arrived at 10:28am.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">The way my husband tells it, my doula banged on the door, he opened it, and she ran in just in time to catch the baby. She told me that she happened to take a new, but shorter, route that day. I'm glad she did.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">A few seconds later, the midwife and her assistant arrived just in time for all the third stage and postpartum stuff. I felt bad because I was so unprepared for a birth that day. I didn't even have a baby blanket to wrap him in. We wrapped him in a t-shirt!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;">So this is it. My last baby. My last hoorah. I'm not sure when labor officially started, but I know it took me longer to type this (one-handed and nursing a baby) blog post than it did to have a baby. And I'm totally ok with that. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17.5636348724365px;"><br /></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6686957348758906262.post-35788891030147459142015-08-17T11:30:00.000-07:002015-08-17T11:41:35.805-07:00I can have an epidural if I want to<div style="text-align: right;">
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When I was pregnant with my first baby, I planned a natural childbirth. I had no idea what to expect, but I had heard that giving birth was the worst pain imaginable. I tried to prepare my mind for pain that was more than I've ever handled before. I read positive birth stories, took an independent childbirth class, and prepared myself to the best of my ability for something that I had no idea what it was like.<br />
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I knew a handful of people who had experienced natural childbirth themselves, but the only one in close proximity was my childbirth educator. She did it, so it gave me hope that I could do it too.<br />
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The big day came, and I did it! I had a natural childbirth. I couldn't believe it. I <i>did </i>that? <i>I</i> did <i>THAT</i>?<br />
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A few years later, I was expecting my second baby and planning a home birth. I had one natural birth, but I began to doubt that I could do it again. Now I knew what I was in for. I knew what birth felt like. Most of the time, I was pretty sure I could do it, but some days the doubt and fear would creep in. What if I lost it? What if I cried? What if I couldn't do it? My husband never doubted that I could do it. He always reassured me that I could do it. After all, I did it once. I could do it again. I wasn't so sure.<br />
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But, as it turned out, I could do it again, and I did do it again.<br />
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Fast forward a few more years, and I was expecting my third baby and planning another home birth. I'd had two natural births, but again, I began to worry whether or not I could do it again. "It hurts!" I told my midwife. And she kind of looked at me like, "Well... yeah. And?" I have to admit that I was more worried about whether or not I could handle the pain than I ever was during my other two pregnancies. I did my best to prepare my mind and body for labor. At this point I was even teaching others about how to have a natural childbirth as a Birth Boot Camp Instructor. Still, I worried about my ability to handle the pain, even though I am stubborn about referring to the sensations of my previous births as painful. Uncomfortable? Yes. Most definitely. Those two births were uncomfortable. But painful? It's really hard for me to use that word for some reason. But for this birth, I worried about pain.<br />
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I kept hearing and kept telling myself, "You've done it twice. You can do it again."<br />
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I hoped so.<br />
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At this point, I don't remember when I thought this, but a few days or weeks before giving birth a third time, I tried to fall asleep while thinking about my upcoming birth. I was again worried about the pain. Then a comforting thought came to me. "I can have an epidural if I want to. If it all becomes too much for me, I can go to the hospital and have an epidural."<br />
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And with that thought, I quickly fell asleep and my fears about the pain disappeared. I had never given myself permission to have an epidural before. With my previous two births, it wasn't an option in my mind. I'd only have an epidural if there was an emergency and I needed one for safety reasons, such as during a surgical birth. For this birth, I gave myself permission to have an epidural for pain relief. And that permission was a huge relief to me. It told me that I didn't have to birth a certain way just because I am a doula or teach natural birth classes or because I've done it twice before. I can give birth the way I need to. If this birth happened to test me beyond my ability to bear it, I could have relief. It was there for me and okay for me to accept it should I need it.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0